About 9 years ago started one of the roughest times in my life...we had no money for entertainment...and so what did we do? We went to the park to walk and talk...meaningful conversation, some of these conversations were just between God and I. Walking through pressure and difficult times was the way God held my attention best.
One of the most amazing things to me was in August 2010...and from then on each late August and early September ever since. My visit to the park began like any other...I parked the car and stepped out onto the grass...passed the Nature Center and headed across the field of burned up grass, now brittle as straw from the pounding heat over the course of the long summer season.
I lifted my eyes up long enough to see the mountain ahead of me and stepped into the woods and began my ascent. I climbed up, heat pounding down...sun oppressively finding me and beating down looking for my submission. My legs fought through heaviness and found the motion to keep pressing onward and upward.
The bees were everywhere and wildlife was scampering about in my peripheral vision. Birds soaring and gliding...their songs filling the air. The chipmunks and squirrels criss-crossing the walking paths with their own unmarked highway.
I could hear the sounds...smell the end of summer coming...the end except not the end of the endless heat. Everything was still seemingly beating down on my shoulders and the back of my neck. The weight and the heat...were relentless.
I finished a couple mile jaunt and turned to head down the hill and back towards the Nature Center. For some reason I slowed and spotted a row of rocking chairs on the porch of the Nature Center and slumped into a rocking chair in front of some tall wildflowers to take a break.
I needed help in life but evidently I wasn't beaten into submission enough to cry out for the help I so desperately needed. So I sat and rocked...and thought about life...
I caught sight in my peripheral vision as I lifted my head--exhausted by life and the chase for peace and redemption...merely thoughts in my head but nothing within my reach. What WAS within my reach was a whole buzz of activity I had never noticed.
There were hummingbirds everywhere--all around me...they were amazing wizards of the sky...dashing this way, darting that way...and soaring straight up...darting left, gliding right, hovering right in front of my face. How had I missed this for so long? They were gray with muted colors, yellow and green with red throated markings. One was jet black with a bright red dot on him...that one I decided was my favorite. The muted and vibrant colors, the color of the wildflowers...shades of orange zinnias, sunflowers and ox-eyed daisies...the smell suddenly filled the air. The sounds of the "chirping" of the hummingbirds chatting at each other filled the airwaves...
It turns out the hummingbirds visit heavily in this same time period every year...their migration cuts a path that intersects this park without fail each year.
I had always been so fixated on my climb and the path ahead that I missed the miracle of life right before my eyes. Whether I had noticed it or not...seen it or not...it WAS happening right before my eyes.
Once a profound truth has been seen...it cannot be "unseen"...for there is no going back to the person you were...
One time when I was in Ecuador I was working side by side with so many others--so many interesting stories that had brought them to this mission field and this week. We were broken into 3 groups/teams...one was leading bible school daily for the children of that region...one was laying brick and build a second floor onto the school...and my team was tasked to lay the foundation for the next team that would come in and build an addition onto the school.
I felt the work I was tasked with was the least important in my mind and less than remarkable in nature...stacking rocks and attempting to level out an uneven dirt lot...and then to use a cement mixer from the 1950's and combine the elements and shuttle wheelbarrows full of cement...well it seemed less than inspiring to say the least.
I tried to hold back and simply lead by example...I really didn't want to push my way to the front and lead this week. On my team were so many younger people and and many of the less cool people by the world's standards...kind of a band of misfits in our own right...and me--one of the oldest misfits working to get our job completed.
On Tuesday we met at night...a secret meeting of the team's leadership which I was invited to attend. I listened and observed...everyone was frustrated with the lack of production...myself included...in fact the harder that I worked in that altitude...I just couldn't make it happen...at least not in my own strength--which was so frustrating. I do recall what emerged from that meeting was a prayer for unity...unity in purpose...of one mind and one purpose--the whole body working together....
When we got up the next morning...it was simply "different"...the day felt different and I was ready for things to unfold with anticipation...I simply knew I had come to the end of me...and that I was ready for God to make something happen.
We were ready for the cement mixing portion of the project...and had less than half of the week to do what was needed. Time is never an issue when we leave it in God's hands...the tasks are never a concern when we leave them with the only one who can see a miracle through.
Ken, one of the senior leaders with contracting experience turned the team over to me...I approached the group and brought us into a circle..."We are going to try some new things today...stay with me...each one of us has a purpose and we will find it here--and today."
First to appear on the scene was Vickie...she was a gruff short spitfire ready to bark out commands if given the power...I'm not certain where she had been all week--but we weren't utilizing her skills. She became my job foreman...calling out the needed supplies and in what order were needed...organization...planning...
Doc (as we called her) and Lisa were our rock shovelers, and Rebecca and Chris Kent were our sand shovelers...and Chad was the cement mix adder...we all were wearing our bandanas over our faces like desperados....
And Chris Jackson from Hurricane Mills...well he was "country strong"...his name after this day...he volunteered to lift every coffin of rocks, sand and cement mix with me --in a combined orchestrated move to bench press and dump each coffin in...I have to tell you I didn't believe he would be tough enough "to hang" and get the job done...but on this day--he was country strong..and super human in stamina and strength. He lifted all told 880 coffins of rocks, sand and cement mix...and I counted each one...being a numbers person--I just did it for fun...
Together the team out performed what any of us would have done alone...we got into a rhythm...I was able to call out the strength in others and make sure they were cared for with water bottles and making sure they took breaks...but none of us really wanted to stop...it was fun--instead of work. The truth is when we work with others doing what we do best it is not work...but calling out the best in each other.
Well--the endless chain of wheelbarrows kept coming as an endless train of energized people...transferring what we were mixing together and spreading it everywhere...that day we worked for 11 hours...and got more done than we had the entire week. Everyone was bringing their best but the combined synergy was colossal...almost every person blistered through double gloves as we wore out our hands...our clothes...our bandanas...what was happening was we had bonded as a group...
I never slept so good as I did that evening...
The next morning I was a volunteer with the bible school and children and was helping them...but thinking about my team. Without me they were still plowing through and would finish ahead of schedule. When the Bible school was completed I tried to simply slip into the background and assist so that I wouldn't disturb the group's rhythm. Instead...once discovered--I was invited front and center like a relative who could not escape a family that loved him...it was that welcoming...a sensation I had not really encountered prior to this...and I filed it away in my heart that picture of this team and the feeling of joy in serving with them.
As the shadows grew long and the last wheelbarrows were completing...I could feel the last of my strength leaving my body...we were completed and 1 day early.
What happens when it's not my strength--or plan? We had time and staff to send painters to paint murals at a vision clinic that did eye surgeries. I'm not a painter...I don't have those skills--but that group of painters painted beautiful murals on the walls for those children who would be coming for years to come. The plan and results were far better than my meager thoughts of completion...there was beauty, compassion and inviting others into the journey together.
I remember the team photos together as we stood--not full of pride--but rather full of joy to have worked together and cared for each other...and where did we all stand? All 3 teams stood on the foundation my team had worked so hard on....
What I could suddenly see was that once gifts and skills were visible to me I couldn't suddenly pretend to no longer see them in others...if no one else could see them --I needed to call out what was visible to me....and if I didn't want to lead...it didn't matter...I was being asked to lead by others...I couldn't hide...someone had seen something in me. There was no going back...Once a profound truth has been seen...it cannot be "unseen"...for there is no going back to the person you were...
I have recalled that week several times...shared this story and others...but I realized there was more to leading than getting a job done...it was the quality of the journey--and caring for those who make the journey with you...and finally celebrating well--together.
I have continued to grow and each team I work with I learn something new...without fail.
I also realized as I continued to "see things" that I needed to speak about what I was seeing...to strengthen others and give them hope.
Growing continues to happen--and then one day it startles us because we see something different in the mirror than what we remembered. Something formerly unseen becomes visible in our lives...
See the unseen...
