As I approached the building and paid the entrance fee my eyes were scanning looking for my son Grant. It was a sea of college aged kids--and the event was a series of fights for different weight classes.
I saw my son's friend Sam and Grant appear from around the corner- side by side - and that was the first and only friendly faces I encountered. Being somewhat suspicious of others to begin with, I had no problem going into my defensive mode....Grant had his hand wraps on and was shadow boxing and listening to his own adrenaline pumping music.
I've known and watched Grant for a long time--but he was laser focused this night in a way I hadn't seen before...some of the other fighters were walking up and down this hallway--eyeballing him...making comments, being rude, disrespectful, and many other things I can't really say here--suffice it to say that their own narcissism or fears played itself out right before my eyes.
Grant and I had talked in front of the ocean about dreams. Now I'm not always a huge dreamer but I do have a few things I will share with those I am tight with in my inner circle if I'm asked. Some dreams are: I want to write or speak in a way that makes the world a better place--a way that changes others--and changes the world, I wanted to manage a team using principles I've learned in difficult places--allowing others to do what they do best--managing from a place of trust--having a high level of accountability--and promoting from within--reducing turnover--increasing morale--all of which = operating from within Trust to give others hope, and I want to see stories have second chances for redemption and restoration.
Grant has dreams too...one has always been to box...to test himself against a great fighter--to see if he can hang against the best. 4 years previously as a freshman he had considered joining a fraternity--mainly for the chance to box in an event that year. He had agonized over staying independent and then not being allowed to participate and compete. He had always lamented over the fact that he had never gotten his opportunity to really test himself.
This year, while he was working a job and being a full time student, he began to attend a gym and found himself a mentor that was willing to tutor and train him about the discipline and skills needed to actually fight. We all need mentors in life that will speak into our lives and encourage us--and teach us....He worked really hard and pushed himself to learn, watch, read and train...he learned so much and pushed himself until he was ready for a test to see how far he had come.
We can all try things--but we never know what we've got within us until we have an opponent to measure our growth.
All of the jeers and taunting he received as he entered the auditorium--he seemed impervious to...he was a picture of concentration--ready to be tested.
In the very first round instead of "touching up" gloves he was greeted with a pretend touch up and thud to the head by an undefeated fighter. What happens in life when we get rocked determines in large part who we will become and who we really are.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78ZaREPJd-Q
If you can see the video on you tube (paste this link) with that address please do--it's riveting...not just because it's my son...but because it's a man determined to show to himself and the world that he belongs.
I was keeping a score in my mind at ringside--I had him winning round 1 and behind in round 2. As he was drinking some water and talking with Sam for strategy he was looking a little tired and unsure for the first time that night. I had little to no time to think up advice...I suddenly found myself yelling--"Grant"--"Get what you came for."
Sometimes it's not the long speeches but rather the wisdom of the simplistic. What did you come all this way for in your journey? Well--are you going to let that moment pass--or are you going to grab a hold and wrestle it with all you have within you?!
As the final bell sounded I realized I had seen my son chase a dream and wrestle it with all of his might...and it revitalized my own dreams within me. I had more to give and still do...and I need to step up and train with an intensity and purpose to exceed that which I had just been a witness to...
I intend to "get what I came for" in 2018...
