Coach's Voice

There are movie characters that resonate with us deeply to our core.  Think about it for a little while and I bet you know what I mean.  There is a movie character for me as well that I hold deeply in my heart---funny his name in the movie is Coach Grant Taylor--the same as my son.  The movie is Facing the Giants.

In the movie, the many struggles and challenges in Coach Grant Taylor's life come to a boiling point--career, personal, family and spiritual.   It is then that God has his attention and he is at rock bottom.  God begins to speak to Coach one situation at a time.  It is then that Coach is willing to trust one small part of his life....then another....incredible things begin to happen.

Coach Grant Taylor begins to speak to the young men he coaches about life, faith, honor and trusting God.  Together they embark on a journey of turning their football season over to God and ultimately it changes their lives as they all learn to trust God. As Coach trusts more he is free to speak with more conviction.  Some things keep happening...are they coincidence?  NO-- God is making sure Coach can walk baby steps...building him up from the rock bottom to the point where he is looking back on where God has brought him on his journey...through deep valleys and up to the mountain top. God wants him to realize he is with him through everything and he likes challenging odds. He challenges him to use his Coach's Voice.


In the end it is the challenge of FEAR vs. FAITH that I always have come back to.

  I have been through some very deep valleys and He is still beside me.  I often wondered back when times were supposedly "really good" when job was great, money plentiful and church family all around with activities abounding. The good times---well, they really were not the good times.

In the valley?  That's where ALL of the growing occurs.  When I was at rock bottom I had conversations with people who expressed their trust and faith in God...it was astounding to me because these folks had absolutely no reason to believe....no reason to trust God that I could see with my limited vision...yet--they were calling to me to trust Him, believe and don't give up.  They were so steadfast, it made me ashamed that I was the believer who had so much....and had been a believer for so long.  Why didn't I believe God would see me through?

For me, living in middle class America...worshiping at church with other middle-upper middle class believers, we really don't have a clue about what struggles are going on out there.  We don't understand what hardship is, and we are ill equipped to help anyone else when something hits hard. I was rocked to the core.

For me, it meant being real with myself and my family first.  Then it meant being honest with my co-workers -giving my best and walking those baby steps and trusting the results to God.  It meant being honest and doing the things I was supposed to do no matter who was watching or not watching.  Now I have to tell you...when you act this way, people will take their shots at you.  It is hard to trust God for the results.  Somedays it is hard to find hope.  I had more than one promotion or position promised to me and I could have been very, very bitter about being sabotaged by the very people promising to protect and promote me.

The old me would have been done with everyone...given up on people being decent, that hard work pays off...because it all depended on me back then.  That takes very broad shoulders to hold that weight up.  I can say that...I felt it, all too long.

I could probably go a million ways from here with this and may tell some more stories in the future and holding on.  All I can tell you for certain is that when the miracle doesn't happen, when the sorrow is deep...when you think you can't go on one more day, He is with you.  Did you hear me?  He is with you and you can make it...you can take one more step.

Really that's all God wants from us..not robots spouting verses, but real people that cry out that they have their doubts, fears.....He wants us to take one more step.  Many times that is ALL I could do.  You know what?  Other people were watching...friendships came from places I never expected and true friendship and encouragement was born in the desert.  It wasn't sometimes anything poetic or burning that I actually said...sometimes it was just a love for my family and not being willing to Quit...and simply taking the next step.

If we are honest--in our struggles and challenges in life--That is where our Fear and Faith collide.

God has given me a gift of another chance at managing a team of people, and He is teaching me to keep my eyes open.  In the past I have been great at cranking out work but a terrible failure at managing others.  He has turned my life around and given me an incredible gift of encouraging and coaching others.  It's so unbelievable that I had a moment after going through monthly meetings one-on-one with each of my staff.  It was a moment where I had encouraged each of them in different areas to be their focus.  My toughest challenging employee had just done a complete 180 and participated in a meeting in a valuable contributing way.  In the past he probably would have made me angry and I would have written him off.  Today--he got a morale pick me up. The feeling in my gut was so cool that I know it was what I was meant to do, and I can see the road how God brought me here.  The things I bring are just what is needed here. If I hadn't traveled the road through the valley, I would not be able to do this right.

If I were to have received that Costco promotion that was promised...or that Krystal promotion that was promised on time.....who knows what my life would be now.  It would have been better that what it was at the time...but it would not be the incredible opportunity I have now to speak into people's lives every day.

Battling through the Fear was something He wanted me to do and until I did that...life was just going to be safe and Okay...but never INCREDIBLE.  It's not the money, power, or prestige....it's doing what you were designed to do that is fulfilling and leaving the results to Him.

All my life I have openly criticized God for how he designed me and never really could figure it out...it made me angry and impatient.

Today, I finally was happy about how He made me......

He gave me my coach's voice


Thank you

Grateful Heart

Thanksgiving

I am especially reminded at this time of the year just how thankful I am for these things from just this past year....

I am thankful for men who stood beside me, men who told me...reminded me and even showed me who I am....

I am thankful I could pick up the phone in the middle of dread and despair and have someone share my gold with me....something no one has ever done...

I am thankful for the strength and perseverance that God granted to me new each day for as long as he wanted me to stand where I was,

I am thankful for getting a new job that he prepared in advance for me and the way he tore away the old jobs to force me in his desired direction.....

I am grateful that when God wants my attention he makes it very clear of direction by stripping things away...even things that he provided to sustain for a period of time,

I am grateful for a wife that loves me throughout periods of difficulty and shares with me lessons we are both still learning,

I am grateful for a new adam man that provided an opportunity to share my love of softball with my son and even paid for his spikes to remove any obstacles and showed love to my son through a game,

I am grateful that God has taught me what enough is...he sustains and a position of enough keeps me centered and still dependent on his leading,

I am grateful that having come through a very deep and long valley that I can appreciate some of the growth and lessons I've been taught that I never would have learned unless I had traveled this path...I would not change the path....it has changed me for the better and saved my life,

I am grateful that I can share the weight of some of my story with men who I do not floodlight...but rather they can sustain and bare the weight because of the miles we have traveled together,

I am grateful that after I had been offered a job and that offering evaporated...that a new adam man reminded me of the grace I have been granted...and called me out to demonstrate what I had been showed over and over again with mercy from unexpected places

I am grateful to men who have told me who I am ... and then given examples of why they believe it....and now I believe it too,

I am grateful for the man who  gave up his treasured flash light...something I frequently use now and remember an I group lesson I will never forget,

I am grateful for the people I have crossed paths with at work who God has placed them in the right place so that I could speak into their lives,

I am grateful for the car brake lights, car fuses, headlights, vacuum cleaner, and recliner that I have repaired in this past year...something unbelievable and that I never had the patience or understanding to do before,

I am grateful for a job where it is desired that I bring who I really am...not the old false self with shield and armor to hide and deflect...but rather someplace where my mistakes and willingness to be transparent become a voice to build a bridge of hope for others,

I am grateful for a son who demonstrated perseverance and called others to do the same in the face of adversity,

I am grateful for a daughter that God has taught her to share pieces of her story and given others strength through that sharing,

I am grateful for the Father's Delight day...I got the chance to speak to the wonderful things about my daughter that I see but fail to vocalize...I am so grateful that she left me a card saying "I love you because....when the going gets tough, you don't run--you stay & fight,

Let's see......My wife has told me I'm enough...My son learned persevering the right way, my daughter made herself vulnerable by saying part of her story in order to help others, and my other daughter understands the importance of staying and fighting for the important things in life.....

I am grateful that my estranged brother and I forgave each other...that I learned what forgiveness is and really feels like.....

I am grateful that God mended relationships and grants grace to fill in the still glaring gaps,

I am grateful that this is the year that God broke the chains of my family's past generations...they will not take hold of my generation.....HOPE reigns, the power they held in the past in silence has no hold when the Light shines on it......

I am grateful for a wonderful and awesome God that has granted me all of this just this year.....any one of these things would have been enough

Grateful....a friend called me and told me I had gone back for him when no one else did...he told me I had gone back for the one...he made me cry.....fulfilled the promise I had been told....

I would love to hear others speaking and sharing what they are grateful for....If you are in the middle of a struggle and can't see something to be grateful for right now....I get it...just know He will walk through that struggle with you and when you come through you will understand and know he was with you.

Where are you God?

Where are you God?

My question was far from an original in any way.  Many people cry out this question every day...in anger...in desperation....in hopes of finding mercy...relief...answers.


Day after day the struggle of life can be more than one can take...but this is my blog so let's make it more specific.

I was drowning in a sea of desperation...an ocean of sadness...no light on the horizon of coming help.

Where are you God?

My family needs me home, I am tired to the bone of every fiber of my being.....

Where are you God?

God was there...

the woman who cuts my hair who paid for my hair cut and then reduced my rate while I was in this struggle...God was in it

the people who helped me get healthcare for my children.....God was there

the people at work who gave us a money tree for Christmas two years ago that allowed us to have a Christmas.....God was embracing us

The boss who gave us her employee turkey to feed us that holiday...God was happy

The people who surrounded us and gave us food/gas cards...God was in it

The worker at Publix who gave us gifts even while she was in the midst of her own struggles....God taught me

The secret gifts given..God saw them all

The family who didn't judge but listened patiently and gave financially....God loved it

My family who listened and gave compassion, financial assistance.....God cherished those moments

The times I cried in the dark full of sadness but trying to be there for my family...God cried with me

The beauty and majesty of Haileigh riding at saddle up...the grit and determination after being thrown...the courage to get up again...God was teaching me

The things my son Grant has said to me that have gotten me through a few more days...God was teaching me it's not what we say intentionally but what our actions speak in the heat of the struggle...that's what people remember about us

The grace and mercy my wife Michelle has shown me throughout this struggle....the raw emotion, realness, and grace.....God was smiling

the times I was so angry but I still talked and yelled at God.....he expected it and accepted my shortcomings...he still loved the relationship

the times I was dangling by a single thread of hope.....he loved me for how he designed me and had more threads lined up to see me through

Look, I first want to state I am not Job.  Stop laughing my family...it wasn't all that funny. I never was a shining example of Godliness or anything of the like.  I did learn about patience and how to how get through from some of his book.  I have learned a great deal.....Too many lessons to put down in a blog at one time.

Today I am thankful for all of it

and....

I wouldn't change a thing

Where are you God?  He is with me....everywhere...all through this journey.

it might be HOPE

The days go on and on as one leads into another....without end....draining the strength and life out of me.


I have written in many of my blogs about the word Hope and what it means to others, the effect it has on lives.  I am now watching it play out in my life.


In the past 24 hours I have seen something that could be hope...I don't want to get too excited for the fear it might not happen...those of you who have been in that place can probably relate.  


Sometimes I even forget what hope feels like...the sensation, the strength it brings internally with it...the change in posture as I stand a little taller, the smile it brings.


I was playing around with my ipod looking at artists and song names looking for something different to listen to.  No offense to John Waller--but I just can't listen to While I'm Waiting for the 1 millionth time.  I came across this Sarah Groves song titled "It Might Be Hope"


the lyrics are below......




You do your work the best that you can 
you put one foot in front of the other 
life comes in waves and makes *its* demands 
you hold on as well as *you're* able 

You've been here for a long long time 

Hope has a way of turning *its* face to you 
just when you least expect it 
you walk in a room 
you look out a window 
and something there leaves you breathless 
you say to yourself 
it's been a while since I felt this 
but it feels like it might be hope 

It's hard to recall what blew out the flame 
it's been dark since you can remember 
you talk it all through to find it a name 
as days go on by without number 

You've been here for a long long time 

Hope has a way of turning *its* face to you 
just when you least expect it 
you walk in a room 
you look out a window 
and something there leaves you breathless 
you say to yourself 
it's been a while since I felt this 
but it feels like it might be hope



Here is the link to listen for yourself......   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRlOLZ0H4ck


I hope if you feel a little beat up by life and circumstances today that it gives you a little inspiration that things may turn around soon--maybe things are working behind the scenes right now that will set the table for something miraculous.

This is how hope starts. Out of the unexpected like this rainbow was the other day....  I get a call from a friend I used to work with telling me what he's doing now.  Sometimes we lay seeds for harvesting later on...when things are bleak and we work on through difficult situations we speak to others about who we are and who they are.  People remember what inspires them to find strength deep inside.


It is frustrating and yet so true that it is not what you know but who you know....the same resume in front of recruiters for a position will never be selected and yet after someone steps in and says "you need to meet this man" they can look at the parts of your history that align and see it so differently.  It takes a few things..someone to stand up for you, and someone further up the hierarchy willing to look outside of the cookie cutter box and really look at people, someone looking for the best result in the end...not the safe result.


The story rolls on... but today....it feels like it might be Hope.

Freedom............

What an amazing thing that God has set us free.

He creates an amazing world...full of beauty, color, wonder and surprise and yet after all that he has done to Wow us he gives us the choice to choose him...not be a robot.

He has given us Incredible FREEDOM.

Free of our sins, free of shame, free to run free.

Somehow we humans seem to get caught up in every other message and leave the good ones behind.  We forget......

My Mom is older now and not always in touch with reality...some very lucid moments and other moments where she thinks everyone is out to get her.  My daughter Haileigh recognizes this and I came home tonight to a beautiful drawing she made for my Mom.

What is amazing to me is the simplicity of the message...yet full of love, full of promise.....

Remember...God sets us free......

I can feel a Braveheart cry coming.......


F-R-E-E-D-O-M!!!!!!

We serve a really great God. Think about that and savor the freedom tonight.

You QUIT

The words are on a page hanging on my son's wall "YOU QUIT"...it is the largest font that would fit on a page.  Grant had quit his football team two years ago.  The football gloves are tacked up on the wall under the sign.  Of all the positive things in his life...this one screams with regret.

He stopped playing football and lost his desire to do the work to make it all happen.

This past year he went to the coach and spoke to him and asked for the chance to work out and play.  Proper communication is a good lesson for kids growing up to learn.  It shows maturity and understanding of a world larger than just themselves.

He set himself as a flint...sharpening skills, working out. It all starts with the work, doesn't it?!  He stayed after school all winter and spring...working out, doing drills...finishing strong.  Finishing strong is something we have talked about together--not just coasting to the finish, but giving the coaches something to think about...letting your actions speak loudly.  He got up at crazy hours all summer lifting weights, working out, doing the drills.  He listened and observed...jumped in on drills against players much larger to try to get noticed..to take on a challenge.

In a few weeks we will see if this all paid off on the field.

I already know it paid off in many ways.  Grant is so much more than that old sign.  I have wanted to tear it down and shred it...but it's not my place this time.  It's up to him to realize.....yes that was what you did, but that is not you.  That could never sum up what you are....

I have so much respect for the diligence, hard work, sweat, teamwork, courage and so much more that I see demonstrated to get to this point.

It should read "NO QUIT".....because there is no quit in him in relation to striving for his goal

I'm Hungry

He was standing in front of me "I'm hungry" he said.  Torn army green jacket, shredded shorts, unmatched socks....I looked up at his face unshaven, weathered, and dirty....

I got him a cold cup of ice water and had him sit in the dining room in the air conditioning.  Some of the other "regulars" made a face at me having him sit down.  Thoughts were racing in my head....some of the crew were warning me "now he'll be back every day."  Possibly will turn out they are right I thought to myself. "Then the word will get out and you'll have all of them here" someone said.

I was picturing my dining room filled with homeless people milling about.

It doesn't matter.  This man needs food....not a tract or a IGBOK bumper sticker...for him it's NOT going to be OK unless someone acts.

Flash back to a time years back when I was headed to a sporting event downtown with my nephew and my young son.  Because we always lived in the suburbs I never really thought about the adventure part of being in the city for my son.  He was wide eyed and taking it all in.  Unlike myself...he really seemed to love all of the tall building and all of the mass of people.

Suddenly a man popped out from behind a tree and asked if we could help out a brother.  I was already passed him and moving on. My brother in law Steve looked at him and saw him.  He talked with him a few brief sentences and slipped some cash into his hand.

My son Grant had many questions for me.  "What did he want Dad?, Why is he so dirty Dad, Why did Uncle Steve give him money Dad, Why didn't YOU give him something Dad?."

Ashamed of what I had taught my son...I quickly reasoned "well Grant, in the city we could run into someone almost every block in need and we don't have enough to share with all of them."  He looked around and said "I don't see anyone else Dad...just him."

I was so unnerved after that that I never enjoyed the sporting event.  I thought about it isn't what we say but what we do that speaks about who we really are.  Another quote I've recently heard "People will listen to what you say but they will believe what they see you do."

What should we do with others in need?

If we can--- we can give them a seat at the table and help them...let them know they are seen and not invisible.

I was hungry at my second job that night but I pictured if my son was watching me...he would have had a whole different set of questions from the events of this day....ones I would have been happy to answer.

In my past life when I sold musical gear there was a young act that came into my office having just arrived in Nashville.  They had a hit later that same year and the lyrics are relevant to this post.

The Twenty-First Time Lyrics Monk & Neagle

Monk & Neagle Lyrics – The Twenty-First Time

Nowhere to live, nowhere to fall
He used to have money, but he’s wasted it all.
His face is a photograph burned in my mind,
but I pretend not to see him for the twenty-first time

He sleeps under stars, that’s all he can afford
His blanket’s an old coat he’s had since the war
He stands on the corner of Carter and Vine
But I pretend not to see him for the twenty-first time

He may be a drifter, he’s grown old and gray
But what if he’s Jesus and I walk away?
I say I’m the body and drink of the wine
but I pretend not to see him for the twenty-first time

She’s twenty-nine but she feels forty-eight
She can’t raise three kids on minimum wage
She’s cryin’ in back of the welfare line
but I pretend not to see her for the twenty-first time

She may be a stranger tryin’ to get through the day
but what if it’s Jesus and I walk away?
I say I’m the body and drink of the wine
but I pretend not to see her for the twenty-first time

This is a call for a change in my heart
I realize that I’ve not been doin’ my part
when I needed a Savior, I found it in Him
He gave to me, now I’ll give back to them

Drifter or stranger, father or son
I’ll look for Jesus in every one
’cause I am the body and drink of the wine
and I’m thankful there’s more than the twenty-first time